An Easter Poem. For Crap Mummies.

Blog Post 8 Comments

The Easter Bunny’s been to visit,

There’s chocolate all around.
And you’ve discovered the best way to eat it…
Without the toddler hearing a sound.
You eat it in the kitchen,
When you’re supposed to be cooking dinner.
You scoff it in the downstairs loo,
Like a covert choccy-egg-destroying sinner.

You’ve hidden all the wrappers,
Put the boxes straight in the bin.
You’ve sucked out the creme from all the creme eggs,
And washed it down with gin.

You’ve somehow eaten all of it,
Every egg, every bunny, every bit…
You’re going straight to Mummy-Hell for this,
Because you don’t even give a shit. 
You don’t care how many Malteser Bunnies lose their faces,
So long as you get your fix.
What the kids don’t know can’t hurt them, right…
*heads off and snorts a twix* 

#HappyEaster

About The Author

Wally Mummy

Potty-mouthed blogger, gin enthusiast and owner of the WallyBubba and the WallyBoy. Says f@*k and vagina a lot. Really knackered.

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8 Comments

  1. Something Crunchy Mummy April 4, 2015

    Love it! High five to all Easter egg eating mummies xx

    Reply
  2. Laura Powell-Corbett April 5, 2015

    I now need to eat the chocolate eggs for breakfast. Acceptable right?!

    Reply
  3. joy April 5, 2015

    Oh yes, I remember it well. One of the downsides of all one's children now being adult. At least they now get to eat their own children's eggs to make up for all the ones they didn't get when they were little :-)

    Reply
  4. Hannah Brooker April 5, 2015

    Fab. And true. X

    Reply
  5. Older Single Mum April 5, 2015

    Happy Easter lovely :)

    Reply
  6. Katie @mummydaddyme April 6, 2015

    Haha so true! Happy Easter. 😉 x

    Reply
  7. Cath Fryer April 9, 2015

    Very true! Love it.

    Reply
  8. Sit with Rose April 13, 2015

    Brilliant! Bon appetit!!

    Reply

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