All hail the magical Jumperoo,
The mystical ring of neglect(-eroo).
The giver of time, the taker of stress,
The circumference of confinement that creates no mess.
It traps all the babies with its rainforest joys,
Fuck knows why I bothered with any other toys?!
It lets you sit down, use both hands, and pretend,
You’ve got your shit together, Jumperoo is your best friend.
Who cares if it takes up more space than your settee,
When you get to drink an ACTUAL REAL-LIFE HOT CUP OF TEA.
Yes, all hail the wonderful Jumperoo.
Respect it or fall victim to the Jumper-poo.
Love it and cherish your infant-restraining device,
Knowing the Jumperoo SAVED YOUR LIFE.
#goodbyeoldfriend
I only recently discovered the jumperoo, too late! I’m pretty pissed off no-one told me about it!
ReplyThat is no fair! Lol x it’s a life saver…
ReplyCommiserations! Said goodbye to our rainforest friend last week as our second (and last) baby has grown out of it – this summed it up beautifully! Fantastic blog, been reading it since my first baby and you’ve made me laugh an awful lot!
ReplyAww x thank you for reading hunny 🙂 let’s drink to our collective post-Jumperoo trauma… Pahahaha xx
ReplyYou’re a bloody genius!
ReplyLol! Thank you! *blushes*
ReplyOk so my child (with the exception of his older brother) is the only child in the history of all children to cry every. Single. Time. He’s in the jumperoo?!?! Come onnnnn… I need my Fricken arm back!!!
Replyoh lord – I’d heard this could happen but assumed it was just a myth! lol x poor you! xx
Replythis made me cry with laughter!!! thank you! 🙂
Replypahaha x you are welcome *curtsies*
ReplyHa! I love this. The Jumperoo is currently giving me back a little piece of my sanity I am hoping my 6 month old doesn’t grow out of it too quickly… Great Blog.x
ReplyIt’s the way forward babes! Lol xx
ReplyMy littlest one was too big to have a jumperoo by the time she was old enough to use one – so we used a travel cot to make a play pen instead… worked perfectly until she started climbing out.
ReplyHa 😉 these things only work for short periods of time don’t they!! Lol xxx
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