My Just a Normal Mummy blog is my therapy,
Since becoming the Tiny Destroyer’s Mum.
For everything else there is Jaffa Cakes and alcohol…
Shame about the widening effect on my bum.
It’s true that I’ve ruined my vagina,
And we all know I’ve talked about that A LOT.
Perhaps it’s because I’d like to go to china,
(Well it rhymed, so it went in that slot…)
I’m the keeper of the world’s curliest toddler,
WallyBubba, ‘The Turdy-Cat-Whisperer’, is her name.
I’ve got her to age two without breaking her,
And developed a gin addiction to deal with the pain…
I have a dining-room dedicated to marmite art,
And can make a pair of leggings last the week.
The other day I almost wore a bra for a while…
And last Tuesday I put pants on as a treat.
So what’s the bastard reason for this poem eh?!
I hear all you Wally-Fans shout.
It’s about these rather lovely bloggy awards;
Yes, the #MADs is what it’s all about.
I’d really love all of you to vote for me.
THIS year I really [email protected]*king want to WIN.
Let’s not beat about the bush, I really need you guys to push,
Else it’s just me, my wonky fanny and some gin.
(and the voices…)
I would really love to be voted Most Entertaining Blog and/or Best Blog Writer. If you would like to help me get nominated in this year’s MAD (Mum and Dad) Blog Awards. All you need is an e-mail address and to follow this link:
Everyone has to vote for Blog of the Year first (yes, I will happily accept votes for this too! heehee), then you can nominate in the individual categories using my blog URL: www.justanormalmummy.blogspot.co.uk
Thank you! Fingers crossed!
If you need further inspiration here’s some of my favourite bloggers:
www.downssideup.com and www.crazywithtwins.com – Amazing inspirational stuff.
www.kiphakes.com – He’s funny, direct and has a fantastic blog. He is short though.
www.californianmuminlondon.blogspot.co.uk – There are cakes. What else could you ever need…
www.thesecretfather.wordpress.com – Awesome writer.
www.actuallymummy.co.uk and www.mamasaurus.co.uk – Blogging Royalty *bows*
www.mummyneversleeps.com – Tough stuff, but amazing writing and so so funny in places.
www.podcastdove.com and www.shutterflies.co.uk – Beautiful photography blogging.
www.ideas4dads.net and www.hurrahforgin.com – Lovely, wonderful and seriously amusing. Defo ones for the newbie category!
www.mummyshambles.wordpress.com – Hilarious and shambolic!
www.allthecampinggear.co.uk www.ooohcrumbs.wordpress.com www.mumofthreeworld.com www.instinctivemum.com I could go on FOREVER. I’ll no doubt add more… But you get the idea!
quite amusing, and according to my husband I don't have a sense of humour so that is a compliment! Also for some reason google+ keeps defaulting from me to him, so if it says Pete, it's not it's mel!Reply
Ha! Well then I am slightly pleased by your response. Thanks Pete. 🙂 lol xReply
Shameless ha – are bloggers British? You are supposed to say "if you don't mind terribly and if it's not too much trouble" but as you are my fav, you've spurred me to action and I've voted for ya. That and I feel sorry for you having a wonky fanny lol #getitfixedwithaballoononharleystreet xxReply
hahaha x well – I could have written like that but it would not have had the desperate, slightly humiliating ring I was going for now would it?! LOL! x Thank you lovely lady xxxReply
Oh how brilliant! The #wonkyvagina gets my vote! I mean your blog, your blog gets my vote 😉Reply
*sniggers* Thank you missus xxx I still haven;t seen your fuck and vaginas post… *wags fingers* LMAO xxReply
Oh this poem is frigging genius – you've even made me swear and I don't F-ing do that very often 😉Reply
Seriously though, bloody good poem – it rocks and so do you!
Good luck with awards season xxx
Thanks hunny :))) and same to you! xxxReply
Good luck! I fully expect to see you make the finals in most entertaining 🙂Reply
Awww thank you! I really hope so :))) x I have no doubt I'll see you there too! xxReply
Hehe this is really funny and your blog always makes me laugh!! Best of luck, you write really really well!!Reply
Thank you lovely! That is so nice to read xxx Good luck to you too! I'm sure you'll be up there xxxReply
Brilliant as always!! If it was up to me you would win funniest blog hands down.Reply
And thanks so much for the mention *blushes* am touched :))
That is so sweet! thank you!Reckon you are a serious contender yourself! xxx Hope to see you there 😉 #ginatatheback xx lolReply
When I see you next we must drink to wonky vagina's – or you win. You HAVE to win this year! Thank you so much for mentioning me – you're on my list for sure xxxReply
You are welcome missus 😉 let's drink to wonky vaginas! lol *clink* xxReply
You are SO funny and I love youReply
heehee x thank you :))) *big cheesy grin* xxReply
Whoop da whoop! Good luck you :))Reply
:))) And to you! xxxReply
Thank you so much for the mention – very kind and will certainly be voting for you :-)- I enjoy reading your blog – very, very amusing and refreshing to see some good fashioned self effacing humour 🙂Reply
You are very welcome 😉 I am a fan of yours also! And thank you for the vote and general complimentary-ness (yes, a word) :))) Hope to see you there! xReply
The very best of luck, you really deserve it – fingers crossed for you. Ps. The poem was very funny. XReply
Thanks lovely – and good luck to you too! xxReply
Good luck! You deserve it! You always make me laugh xReply
Gosh thanks lovely :)) and good luck to you too! xxReply
I think I may have voted already before I read this. Thank god I voted for you anyway! Blogging Royalty, eh? I like that a lot – must get my business cards altered xReply
*fist pump* :))) x woohoo! Thank you :)) Oh yes you must. *curtsies*Reply
Awesome poem hun, good luck in the MADS….Reply
Thank you lovely xxxReply
Oh blimey come yonder and accept your big smoochy kiss! xReply
*promises never to wash face sgain* lol! :))) xxReply
I wish I hadn't just taken a swig of coffee when I clicked on your link! *splutter* Thanks for writing about the awards. Good luck!Reply
ha! I shall provide a hot drinks warning in future :))) lol x Thanks for the comment! I have everything crossed xxxReply
I have voted for you – the recent poetry has made me laugh so much. Particular the x-rated toddler. Ashamed to say that "for foxes sake" was uttered in our house recently by a minor. Gin all round I think.Reply
heehee x thank you so much 😉 gin all round indeed! xxReply