We went for a lovely day out to the farm…
And, I would just like to say that anyone with an overactive toddler who has ever pretended that a day out involving farm animals and un-enclosed paths is actually ‘fun’ is FUCKING LYING or smoking crack.
I totally agree that the toddlers enjoy it; they shitting love it. They can throw animal faeces at five year olds, power-hug rabbits and indulge in multiple instances of ice-cream/cake/pebble consumption… what’s not to like…
With some clever editing the photos can disguise the lies and hide the tears really quite effectively… A day of trauma for any parent can be ‘facebooked’ into a beautiful family day out full of nature, smiles and cuddles… but we all know the behind the lens the truth is closer to a pre-schooler version of ‘Lord of the Flies’ and that Mummy has the battle scars to prove it…
|Only one rabbit was harmed in the making of this photo.|
|Attempting to act naturally after punching a lama.|
|This is mine now. I’ve licked it.
And taken a shit on the bonnet.
|Staring out a goat.|
|You can’t see it but she’s stamping on the tears
of a thousand fairies… and a Guinea Pig.
|Who says you can’t eat the gravel…|
|Waterboarding a peacock.|