I thought I would write a little poem,
about my impending new-baby joy.
And announce that this ever-expanding WallyBump,
will be a beautiful, bouncing Wally-Boy.
Yes, we’re joining the squad of the scrotum;
officially members of #teamblue.
We’re part of the penis-gang, the brigade of the balls,
I haven’t got a bastard clue what to do…
Up to now I’ve only mastered vaginas,
being a proud owner of one of my own.
With fannies I’m fine, (although I’ve totally ruined mine…),
this is my first time as a pee-pee chaperon.
We’ve gently broken the news to WallyBubba,
who said the scan looks like a disgusting frog.
‘He’s not sharing my bath, my highchair, or my room,
he’ll have to sleep outside like a dog.’
So this is my little poem,
about the arrival of my own WallyMan.
You might think I’m silly, I’ll just be no good with a willy,
but I can’t wait to have one in the WallyClan.