Dear vagina,
Please don’t let me down.
We’ll be in it together,
When the baby starts to crown.
I’m relying on you,
To get me through this shit.
To hold yourself together,
And not fall apart or split.
I need you to maintain relationships,
With my pelvic floor and perineum.
So you can swiftly deliver,
My uterus to freedom.
My uterus to freedom.
I’ll need you in future,
I need you up to the task.
If I ever want to have fun times again,
Without doing it in the… *cough* dark…
So please vagina,
Just get me through this thing.
I promise just one way traffic after this,
Under the calming influence of gin.
#dearvagina
#gin
#4weekstogo
#gin
#4weekstogo
Hahahaha great poem, particularly like the fall apart or split bit. I wish you and your vagina well 🙂
ReplyWhen I got married at the tender age of 17, one of hub's workmates wrote a comment "Make the most of it now because one day It'll resemble a ripped settee". I think he was talking about my fadge.
ReplyNot the nicest comment to be writing on someone's wedding card and I was slightly miffed at the time but it has proved to be depressingly accurate.
Three words – pelvic floor exercises!
Hope this helps. 😀
Hope your vagina listens – she can be a wet lettuce at times 😉 Have loads of drugs and you won't care. Eek – not long now xx
Replybrilliant!!! I wish you both well! Xx
ReplyYou are too too too funny. Don't worry your fanny won't let you down 😉
Replyxxx
I hope it all goes smoothly! x
Replyeek! So close, good luck
ReplyFOUR WEEKS OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Vom x
ReplyHahaha, brilliant poem, good luck to you and your vagina.
ReplyFour weeks till Gin Day! Hurrah! Don't worry about your vagina, she was born for this. xx
ReplyOnly four weeks to go! Eeek! Tracy's comment made me laugh – wise words as ever! Good luck. x
Reply4wks to go and I'll have to start sharing the gin again
ReplyAhhh good luck mate – so close! Fingers crossed your vag won't let you down, am sure she's a tough old boot 😉 x
ReplyI am sure that you and your vagina will be BOSS. 🙂 xxx
ReplyHahaha!! Love this x
Reply